


ace of your heart

by Anonymous



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexuality, Coming Out, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Acephobia, Light Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-28
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:55:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28375005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Jisoo goes through a dilemma about his identity leading him to ignore Junhui, leaving the younger in the dark.Yet, Junhui waited,
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Wen Jun Hui | Jun, Jeon Wonwoo/Kim Mingyu
Kudos: 34
Collections: Anonymous





	ace of your heart

“Jisoo wait!”

Ignoring Junhui’s calls, Jisoo walked through the many people at the party looking for the one person he needed. Finally finding him near a wall talking to someone, Jisoo marched up to him and grabbed his arm firmly, but not too harshly.

“Wonwoo,” he whispered into his ear, “we need to go. Now.”

“Oh okay, I guess I’ll see you later Mingyu...”

Turning around Jisoo made his way out of the party, not even bothering to wait for Wonwoo to finish his conversation. He went to get his coat and was about to go through the door when a hand on his arm stopped him.

“Hey Jisoo,” Jeonghan asked with a smile on his face, “where are you going?”

“Home.”

“Home? Why?” Jeonghan questioned with furrowed brows, “what happened to the plan?”

“Fuck the plan, Jeonghan can you just let me go?”

“Fine, but I’m coming with you.”

Jisoo just ignored the elder and walked outside waiting for Wonwoo to come out so that he could finally leave that wretched place and everyone behind. He looked at the window which gave him a glimpse into the party and saw Junhui talking with his friends, laughing except it didn’t reach his eyes. He turned around and clenched his fists, willing himself not to cry for someone who probably wanted nothing to do with him.

•••

“So what the hell happened hyung?” Wonwoo asked as he drove the car, Jisoo in the backseat while he and Jeonghan sat at the front, “even I lasted longer at this party than you.”

“Because you were about to fuck Mingyu on the kitchen counter.”

“Shut up Jeonghan-hyung!”

“What? I saw the way you were looking at him,” Jeonghan said with a sly smile on his face, “it was the same look that Junhui was supposed to have on his face tonight, what the hell happened Jisoo?”

“I can’t.”

“Come on Jisoo,” Jeonghan said turning around to look at the American boy, “you know you can tell us-“

Jeonghan stopped talking once he saw the state that Jisoo was in. The younger had his head bowed down as tears streamed down his face, his hands gripping hard at his knees probably in an attempt to stop himself from full-on sobbing.

“Wonwoo-yah, pull over quickly.”

Wonwoo looked in the car mirror and saw Jisoo before nodding and finding a spot to park the car quickly. When the car finally stopped, the two boys unbuckled their seatbelts and turned around to look at Jisoo who was now sobbing into his knees, curled up in the backseat of Wonwoo’s car.

“Oh my God,” Jeonghan muttered as he climbed to the back next to Jisoo, “hush, Jisoo-yah, it’s okay, there’s no need to rush, you can take your time.”

“I can’t Hannie.”

“Yes you can, you can take all the time you-“

“No Hannie you don’t understand,” Jisoo pulled away from Jeonghan his head still bowed down, “I can’t do it now, or later, or ever.”

“Hyung, talk to us,” Wonwoo pleaded from where he was sitting at the front, “please. We want to help you.”

There were a few moments of silence in the car, the only noises being Jisoo crying and sniffling while Jeonghan rubbed circles into his back. 

“I’m asexual.”

If not for the silence, they would have never heard the words that Jisoo whispered so delicately. Jeonghan simply nodded, still rubbing circles into Jisoo’s back and he pressed a light kiss to Jisoo’s temple.

“Is that when you don’t need sex hyung?” Wonwoo asked timidly, not wanting to offend the elder.

“It’s a spectrum so different people have different explanations,” Jisoo started wiping his tears away from his eyes, “but I just can’t have sex ever. Just the thought of it makes me feel sick.”

“Oh Shua,” Jeonghan said, making Jisoo rest his head on his shoulder, “I understand you needed time to tell us this, but if you were feeling uncomfortable you could’ve told us not to talk about it.”

“No, it’s fine when you talk about it I don’t care,” Jisoo reassured, taking hold of Jeonghan’s hand, “it’s just that I like and care about Junhui so much, but back at the party when it felt like he wanted to take things further my stomach was churning,” Jisoo let out a pitiful chuckle, “he probably hates me now.”

“No he doesn’t hyung,” Wonwoo said, “I know Junhui and he cares about you too much to let something like this bother him. You don’t have to tell him right now obviously but I promise when you do he will accept you with open arms.”

Stiffly, Jisoo nodded and sat back up into a sitting position, his hands still intertwined with Jeonghan’s.

“Can we go home now, please? My head hurts and I want to sleep.”

“Sure hyung.”

•••

Even though he liked to joke and play around a lot, Junhui knew where to draw the line.

Something was going on with Jisoo, his boyfriend hasn’t spoken to him since the party last week and he was getting worried. He wasn’t answering his texts or calls and whenever he saw the elder, he always went out of his way to avoid the Chinese boy. When he had asked Jeonghan about it, he had said that all Jisoo needed was some time to himself to think things over yet the two were always attached to each other’s side.

“I think you’re getting a bit jealous there Junhui,” Wonwoo said listening to his friend rant, “just give Jisoo-hyung some time, he’ll come to you soon enough.”

“What about you? You were the one who drove Jisoo home, you must know something!”

“Of course I do,” Wonwoo said sharply before sipping his coffee, “but I can’t tell you what happened that’s a violation of trust.”

“I know that,” Junhui groaned, “please just tell me that Jisoo isn’t going to break up with me for Jeonghan.”

Wonwoo choked on his coffee at Junhui’s words and laughed loudly as he reached for some tissues.

“Where the fuck did you get that idea from?”

“Don’t laugh Wonwoo-yah,” Junhui glared at his supposed best friend, “this is a serious issue.”

“I’m seriously telling you that Jisoo is not cheating on you and he will tell you when he’s ready.”

“Okay.”

“See how easy it is when you trust me?”

“Oh no, I don’t trust you,” Junhui looked at his phone home screen which was a picture of him and Jisoo before smiling dreamily, “I trust Jisoo.” 

•••

The day that Jisoo felt confident enough to finally tell Junhui, he asked Jeonghan to call the boy instead of telling him as he still felt wary about facing the younger when he had avoided him and ignored him for such a long time.

Sitting in the booth at the cafe, Jisoo looked out of the window at the people walking by on the pavement waiting for Junhui’s face to join them while he sipped on his drink.

“Hey, Jisoo.”

Choking slightly in his drink, Jisoo turned around to see Junhui standing next to the table with his hands in his pockets.

“Oh, um, hi Junhui,” Jisoo stuttered out as he watched Junhui take the seat opposite him, “I didn’t see you walk by.”

“I came from the opposite direction, I was with Wonwoo and Mingyy before.”

“Did Wonwoo tell you anything?” Jisoo blurted out, only to feel embarrassed afterwards.

“No, don’t worry.”

Nodding, Jisoo drummed his fingers against the table, a wave of anxiousness suddenly hitting him now that Junhui was in front of him.

“Do you want to order first or should I start talking?”

Junhui looked Jisoo up and down thoughtfully as if he was examining the older man before clicking his tongue and looking towards the counter. 

“I can order first. Take all the time you need before you start talking Shua.”

Smiling at the use of the nickname, Jisoo nodded and watched Junhui get up from their table to get a drink. When the younger came back to the table, he started to sit down on Jisoo’s side only to stop himself and go back to sit opposite Jisoo. It would be a lie if Jisoo said the action didn’t hurt slightly, but he knew that Junhui was just trying to be cautious after almost a week of avoidance.

Jisoo watched Junhui drink his milk tea, smiling at the way the younger’s eyes lit up as he looked at his surroundings. His nerves lessened, and he took a deep breath as he shifted in his seat.

“Junhui, there’s something I need to tell you.”

Junhui nodded and Jisoo took another deep breath.

“Junhui, I’m asexual. I don’t like sex, never have, never will and that’s why I left the party. Why I was ignoring you. I was so scared of how you would react when you found out so I tried to put it off, but I can’t. Not anymore.”

Jisoo had his head bowed down, too scared to lift his head and see the expression on Junhui’s face, especially since he hadn’t said anything yet. Vaguely, Jisoo registered Junhui moving from his seat and his heart clenched at the thought that he was leaving, walking away from Jisoo and their relationship. Instead, he sat next to Jisoo, and wrapped his arm around the older’s shoulder, bringing him closer to him.

“That’s perfectly normal Jisoo-yah,” Junhui said, pressing a kiss to Jisoo’s cheek, “I accept you and you being ace won’t change our relationship.”

“Really?” Jisoo asked, raising his head to look at his boyfriend.

“Really,” Junhui said, a smile on his face, “I’m in this relationship for you, not for sex.”

“That was so cheesy,” Jisoo laughed, hiding his face in Junhui’s shoulders.

“Is that why you’re blushing?” Junhui teased before taking a sip of his milk tea, allowing Jisoo to stick his tongue out at him playfully.

The two of them eventually fell into a light playful chatter, leaving behind any worries that they brought with them into the shop, Junhui feeling reassured and Jisoo feeling valid.


End file.
